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Top Candidates For The 2018 Nobel Peace Prize

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There are 331 candidates for the 2018 Nobel Peace Prize laureate, whom the Norwegian Nobel Committee will reveal on Friday. The Onion takes a look at the top contenders for this year’s Peace Prize.


Kim Jong-Un & Moon Jae-In:

No two other people on Earth gave a more impressive handshake in the past year.


Edward Snowden:

Perhaps no one has made a greater impact on global peace than Snowden, who’s famous for doing something with computers a few years ago.


Malala Yousafzai:

This shameless attention addict just can’t bear letting anyone else share the spotlight, can she?


Pope Francis:

It’s not like he personally molested anyone.


John McCain:

The hawkish longtime U.S. senator has ceased advocating for widespread U.S. military intervention.


Emmanuel Macron:

He’s the democratically elected leader of a Western European country, so it just seems to make sense, right?


Arctic Council:

Might as well throw them a bone now since they’ll have nothing to advocate for in a couple years.


Donald Trump:

Just to own the libs.


The, Like, Concept Of Love:

It’s all out of this world, man, you dig?


Discounted Newspapers


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