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The Onion’s 2018 Fall Movie Preview

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Awards season is here, with a variety of biopics, prestige dramas, and politically charged movies vying to join the long list of wildly overrated Oscar winners. The Onion presents a guide to the most anticipated films of fall 2018.

A Star Is Born:

This movie about a singer-songwriter who gets her big break will have to overcome Hollywood’s famous distaste for movies about the entertainment industry if it stands a chance of winning any awards.

Private Life:

As you can probably guess from the title, and lead Paul Giamatti, it’s that kind of film.

First Man:

The movie about the first moon landing is drawing controversy over its decision to whitewash Neil Armstrong’s ardent anarcho-syndicalist beliefs.

Fahrenheit 11/9:

Curious audiences across the country will finally find out whether director Michael Moore thinks the Trump administration is good or bad.

The Predator:

In this star-studded blockbuster, the interstellar hunter returns to Earth in search of fresh profits.

Night School:

Critics have already named this lighthearted comedy one of the top 10 Kevin Hart films of 2018.

Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes Of Grindelwald:

Yup, Hollywood somehow still isn’t done cranking out Harry Potter shit yet.

Mary Queen Of Scots:

Fans of rich period dramas with lush British landscapes, heavily accented dialogue, and beautifully intricate gowns are going to cream their fucking seats.

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