WhatiLearned.com - What I Learned
ELIZAVILLE, NY—Speculating as to whether or not the social order could ever regain its stability, witnesses confirmed Thursday that the established interpersonal hierarchy at Camp Eagle Hill had been thrown into turmoil by the emergence of a second girl with practical knowledge of the French braid. “This is completely unprecedented—apparently Chloe watched YouTube tutorials on braiding during Tech Ed the other day, and now she and Natalie are locked in a soft-power struggle over the 12 bunks of Mallard Cabin,” said camp counselor Yvonne Ferris, carefully observing as a group of campers, moving uncannily like a school of small, brightly colored fish, drifted away from the former holder of the braiding monopoly and crossed the mess hall towards the enigmatic new granter of intricate coiffures. “It’s not just Mallard—at least half of Canvasback has now thrown their full loyalty behind Chloe. I hear she was tacitly endorsed by a lifeguard who once let Natalie braid her hair during swim break—a complete transgression against precedent. We’re one tight updo away from complete anarchy.” At press time, protocol had been further disrupted by the spreading news that Cara, the new girl, had arrived with her hair in a perfect and reportedly self-administered fishtail braid.